Posted in Blog, college, Daily, Diary, Experience, life, Life, Life, Love, lyrics, Misc, Miscellaneous, Musings, People, personal, Personal, Personal, Photography, Picture, Relationships, Romance, School, sleep, Thoughts, Uncategorized, Uncatergorized

Like the Sunshine (Two Year Anniversery on WordPress)

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Well now, this is special!

I’m posting tonight because I received a super special notification from the happy chappies at WordPress.com. Two years ago, I started this blog as a method of journaliing my musings and other ramblings as a way to manage stress. At the time of this blog’s creation, I had been faced with a lot of dreadful uncertainties that would leave me with knots in my tummy for nights on end. I had only just started my long distance relationship with an absolutely lovely girl and was afraid that we would never meet or be able to make it happen. My studies at both university and a community college had reduced me to a state resembling that of a nervous wreck; hair tearing and all.

The year after, my relationship had become stable. My classes had become manageable. I had begun my student work placement and had learnt more than I ever did in high school. About life, about love and about the world beyond high school. For once, my life seemed right. I was at peace.

And now, in 2016, many things have changed. My graduation, the fated meeting in Lover’s Arrival, the beginnings of my search for employment, the collapse of my relationship …

All of it proof that we are forever learning by experience. That the wildest and most unexpected things can happen, even when plans have been made and are seemingly set in stone. Life is what happens when you are busy making plans. And that, Mr. Lennon, is something that we can both agree on. Being the tired man that I am, i am not sure what I am supposed to be writing anymore here. The paragraphs that come after this were actually written first. This post is a mess, chaotic, just like life. It wasn’t planned. I had a general idea and the structure of the post all in my mind and then as I began to write it down, different thoughts flooded into my mind and altered those plans. Or took a sledgehammer to them. Completely.

This might sound awfully corny but I gotta write it …

In the past two years, I have become rather fond of moths. Now, I never liked moths as a kid. I always thought they were grotesque and wouldn’t think twice about shooing them away with a dainty wave of the hand. They were ugly to most people. Undesirable. And I often considered myself to be of a similar calibre. But all it took was one mental comparison, one alternate trail of thought, and my love for them began to blossom. There are those in the world that see beauty where others simply cannot. Those that find something beautiful where nothing of the sort can be found and observed by the average person. And I had the pleasure of meeting a few of these cherishable souls. The absolute honor of calling one my teacher, another one my friend, my lover …

Of course, you. My readers.

These people and their stories, their wisdom, their kindness and their love formed my coccoon and now I too, have become a one of these souls.

I’d like to thank you all for reading my blog over the past two years and do hope that you stick around for another.

May all the love in the world be yours. And remember, everybody’s gotta learn sometime. 

You know which song this is going to link you to … 

(It’s 3 AM and I sure could use some sleep … )

Posted in Blog, Uncategorized, Uncatergorized, Web, WordPress

Dear WordPress …

If you guys and gals could work on a desktop app that doesn’t crash every ten mintues, we desktop bloggers would very much appreciate that. And before you reccommend using the website through a browser, I’ll add that for whatever reason, Vivaldi doesn’t seem to like the WordPress site in general. Figuritively speaking, of course.

Thank you very much!

 

Posted in Blog, Daily, Diary, Funny, Holidays, life, Life, Life, Miscellaneous, Thoughts, Uncategorized, Uncatergorized

Gross Domestic Cuddles. (Happy Holidays!)

Couldn’t care less about the GDP. I only care about the GDC.

I honestly don’t know what I was thinking when I wrote that title. I thought I’d keep it anyway because not only do I like it but I feel as though my brain would overheat like a pre-2005 computer running Crysis and then proceed to liquify through my ear holes if I tried to actually muster the effort to cognitively craft a more relevant one.

I really haven’t been blogging much at all. I think I’ve written like, ten posts about the same issue but being the apologetic scrub that I am, I feel the need to say sorry a thousand more times to ward off a bitter metaphorical bludgeoning. Since the Holiday season is pretty much around the corner, I think I’ll take this opportunity to wish everyone a Happy Holidays, just in case I don’t end up blogging again in the near future due to Holidays related stuff. Or don’t blog ever again after the excruciating yet delectable death by Christmas ham.

So, Happy Holidays everyone! And in case I don’t end up chatting to you before the year is up because I’m too busy smuggling protein bars in my messenger bag or something, have a Happy New Year!

I’ll just leave you with some footage of the upcoming year …

 

This … is amazing!

Posted in Blog, boredom, college, Daily, Holidays, interest, life, Life, Life, Misc, Miscellaneous, Musings, personal, Personal, Personal, Uncategorized, Uncatergorized

Sicker Than the Dog Day

Oh man … my shins. They ache …

 

I’ve currently been a bed ridden, airway congestion stricken mess for the past few days now. That and I’ve been spending a bit more time with my Twitter account, seeing through to it’s lift off. 125 followers is darn good for a two week effort and I honestly couldn’t be anymore thankful than I am now. Anyone that follows me on anything is seriously in the right lane for a Thank You hug and a drink.

Although, I don’t consume alcohol. So … I guess I’ll just buy you a beer or something and then just awkwardly sit there while you enjoy that.

“So uhh … Is the beer good? That’s great! Yeah!”

There isn’t really any excuse for me NOT to blog at the moment apart from my sickness. School is just about out and December, apart from Christmas and New Years,  is kind of a ‘dead month’ for me.

Anyways, I’m going to do my best to work off this cold. You guys and gals have yourselves an awesome week. ^w^

Ta-ta!

 

Posted in life, Miscellaneous, People, personal, Thoughts, Uncatergorized

Purposeless Me

Day to day slingin’. Nothing else kickin’.

As much as I hate to post this dribble, I feel as though it is something that I simply cannot help but do. The blessed few that choose to actually follow this blog would roll their eyes at the sight of another ‘Can’t get my shit together’ post. But at least they would silently congratulate me within their own minds for not using some tacky song lyrics that relate to the topic of post. That was some ‘teen on Facebook’ shit right there.

For the past few years now, I have found myself beaten into a fixed state of same. Stirred along within a seemingly omnipotent cocktail of boredom, longing and an adamant sense of meaninglessness. It’s like ever since I reached a particular age, something just flicked the kill switch on my enthusiasm and motivation, my sense of humour and accompanying ability to laugh, leaving me as a generally withdrawn ‘master of disguise’. Because I bet that nobody that knows me in person has the slightest clue that I am quite possibly the most empty feeling people in their lives.

It all sorta went downhill after my fourth year in high school. I was a generally happy dude, too. Rather extraverted, to be completely honest. If there ever was a party or a social event planned amongst the friend-os, 90% of the time it was I who had cooked it all up. And because of that particularly likeable image of a past self worth liking, I would often compare my current self at any given point in time to that, with the accompanying self questioning of where everything went so wrong. And honestly, even to this day, I still don’t have the answers.

But now, a new question has arose alongside those previous queries; “Do I really need the answers at all?”

I can imagine that dwelling on this would be relatively unhealthy no matter how I look at it. And part of me feels that even if I did have the answers, I would still feel as empty as I normally do. There is simply no going back. Those old friendships, that old way of living … they’re pieces that simply do not fit into the metaphorical puzzle. Wearing the same old leather jacket comes without it’s original meaning, washed away by the waves of change.

It’s a war within the self, I tell you. Two sides with their each ambiguous question;

“I want to go back. Why can’t I go back?”

“I want to move on. Why can’t I move forward?”

I fear that the answers may be as simple as this; I cannot go back because I am meant to move forward. But I cannot move forward because I want to go back.