Posted in Anxiety, Blog, boredom, college, Daily, Diary, Funny, Health, humor, interest, life, Life, Life, Misc, Miscellaneous, Musings, personal, Personal, Personal, Thoughts, Uncategorized, Uncatergorized, Update, Web, WordPress, Writing, Youth

‘Jobless & 21’ or ‘I Did 4 Years of College in Two and a Half and All I Got Was This Lousy Beanie’

Before I start this little post, I thought I would list all of the things that I have obtained since I graduated from tertiary college back in July 2016, just so that this post doesn’t come of as entirely negative. So without further adue, the stuff which I got after I finished uni includes:

  • Two flashy certificates with wax seal stamps (A degree and a diploma)
  • A beanie from one of my colleges.
  • A four-colour pen. (The tutor had a spare)
  • An appreciation for volunteer work.
  • An apperciation for working in the social work/community development sector in general.
  • A mechanical keyboard for my shitty six year old Mac.
  • A new phone that now, is kinda useless to me for anything other than making/receiving calls.
  • A mean looking ‘Middle Eastern beard’
  • Another friend group.
  • A taste for pale ales and lagers.
  • A taste for alcohol in general.
  • Patriotism.
  • A car.
  • A black pair of super skinny jeans. (Yeowch!)
  • A fondness for the beach and the ocean.
  • Lady friends in Italy. (Thanks Instagram!)
  • Lady friends in Turkey. (Again, Thanks Insta!)
  • A license to sell/serve alcohol. (I could become a bartender maybe … ?)

I am sure there are way more but I honestly can’t think of them off the top of my head. Now then, why don’t we make it fair and list the things that I did NOT receive or obtain after my graduation?

  • A job.
  • Money.
  • A job.

Despite applying for work like mad, nothing seems to be going my way. A lot of people have told me that going back to Uni would be a waste of another two or three years and would put me at risk of being considered ‘overqualified’ for my field of choice. Of course, I would take any job at this point in time. Hence why I’ve found myself completing short course after short course to obtain some extra skills in the employability department. (License to Serve, First Aid, a course on how to make coffees/cappucinos at a bar/cafe/restaraunt, a certificate in training and assessment, etc)

People keep telling me that something must come along eventually. Let’s just hope that these people are right, and are also talking from experience.

Anyways, that’s my post for the month/year/decade. What have YOU been up to?



Posted in Blog, college, Daily, Diary, Health, life, Miscellaneous, personal

My Room is the Panic Room

Lately, at night, I’ve found myself succumbing to crippling anxiety which often ends up becoming a full blown panic attack. It normally starts off as I decide to get some shut eye. For whatever reason, the racing thoughts through my head seem uncontrollable and often ‘loud’ as I’m about to doze off.

Does anyone else feel this way? If you deal with anything anxiety related, would you chuck a pal some tips on how to deal with it?

I’d really appreciate any help right now. Going to bed at 2 AM on a daily basis is starting to mess me up.

Posted in Funny, Health, life, Musings, sleep

A Freudian Picnic

Balls crazy, man.

Last night, I had the pleasure of having one of ‘those dreams’. You know, the ones that make you question what kind of shit your brain does within the realm of the subconscious. To quit dawdling about and cut straight to the chase, I dreamt that a cute little black and white kitten was being rejected by it’s mother when trying to feed. Zoom out and apparently, this shit is going down within some kind of suburban war zone. You’ve got soldiers all firing at each other, wearing camouflage and all that. And this one dude running around jamming his knife into people before they can even notice the bastard. Untouchable Knife Man proceeds to pretty much indiscriminately stick his knife into any warrior he comes across.

Yeah, so that was my night. What’d you get up to?

"This guy probably would've made some connection to the relentless stabbing and my sex drive, or something."
“This guy probably would’ve made some connection between the relentless stabbing and my sex drive, or something.”
Posted in Funny, Health, humor, Humour, interest, life, Life, Life, Miscellaneous, personal, Personal, Personal, Uncategorized

Snot Grott 

It’s that time of year Down Under. The warmer days suddenly depart without even leaving a letter of warning and before you can say “Wish I packed my turtleneck ….”, you’re struck by the sheer coldness of a ‘wet season’ morning. It’s enough to make one gingerly grasp onto each arm in a futile attempt to maintain a consistent body temperature and say “Yowza, this weather’s gone bowser.” 

Bowsers aside, this particular shade of weather also brings with it the cloud of metaphorical pestilence that is the quite physical and very much bacterial common cold. Your nose starts dripping like a leaky faucet, your sinuses feel like they’ve been inflated with a substance that can only be described as ‘hurting’ and your ears cave in on themselves like an unstable Dig Dug arena. 

So you can imagine how much of a Hurculean effort it was to drag myself to class on one of the coldest days to ever beat my body into a merciless temperature based submission. My flu ridden hide staggered all over the place in an attempt to actually make it from the bus, across a street and to my class without either falling flat on my puffy red face or being picked up by the police on the count of looking like a druggo. It got even worse when it came time to  try and interact with my fellow classmates. Most of them simply told me to just go home. And Jesus tap dancing Christ, I wished those poor suckers luck on trying to understand even 50% of the shit that came out of my mouth. My voice was so nasally and quiet that it felt like someone had jammed a shotgun suppressor into my mouth.

Yes, I know that wasn’t a good analogy. I regret nothing. 

“This guy obviously didn’t get the species related memo that people viruses can’t affect him. Bless his heart for wanting to fit in though.”

If you’re suffering from a cold, or anything else that is affecting your ability to make it to your painstakingly arbitrary lecture, I wish you luck. And maybe a lossange or two. You’re going to need those. 

Posted in Comedy, Experience, food, Health, humor, Humour, life, Life, Life, Miscellaneous, personal, Personal, Personal, Spiritual, Tech, Technology, Uncategorized, WordPress, Work, Youth

Speed Posting To Raise Boredom Awareness 

Hey hey hey hey. 

I’m afraid I am going to have to be lighting quick with how swiftly I get this post out before my ride arrives so I’ll make like a Bugatti Veyron and do 0 to 60 in 3 seconds. 

As you all know, boredom is a problem that is plaguing the entire human race. At its most vulnerable moment, boredom affects the suffering citizens of the first world in the most excruciatingly painful ways. Forget things like starvation, poverty and AIDS; It’s boredom we need to vanquish first before we can even consider donating money to the aforementioned causes. 

By donating three difficult monthly payments of 14 dollars and exactly 21 cents, you can help those stuck in the pit of tedium by donating to the Breaking Boredom Foundation. 

Do your part and help us raise funds to find and develop a cure for boredom today! 

“Stop complaining on Tumblr and go outside.”

Posted in Health, life, School

Sleepy Student Sits Sorrowfully

The day feels like it’s dragging out a little longer each time I think it’s going to end. It just seems to be sluggishly inching at a snail’s pace, making class all the more unbearable. Mix that with the fact that I am seemingly caught in the middle of a pretentious opinion related crossfire, and you’ve got one sleep deprived young man who is less than enthusiastic to be here.

Even after the class had ended, I found myself forced to slum about in the campus library. Ironically, it was noisy as anything as all of the loud mouthed, pop culture wearing I.T kids were about and boasting to the others about their gaming set ups or Razor mechanical keyboards. Include the gleeful skater kids and the trade students bludging about solely because of the air conditioning and I’d say that’s a triple threat.

Of course, in reality, I probably wouldn’t mind in the slightest. It’s only when I’ve had less than my usual  6 hours of sleep that I seem to find a fault in anything and everything. An irritable wretch who sits there, stubble and all, while his classmates make jokes about his baggy eyes or his droopy headedness at his expense.

I am really going to have to sort out my sleeping pattern.

"Well, that's enough life for one day."
“Well, that’s enough life for one day.”