So yeah. The job market isn’t exactly flash. There’s nothing for me to nab in terms of part time work and full time professions require higher specced qualificaitons. So I’m on my way back to uni.
My first experience at a college wasn’t one that left a good impression. Unlike the partygoers in the States, we Aussies reckon that the mere act of spending more than an hour on campus is ‘fucken’ shithouse’ and that living on campus in a dorm is a special privilege reserved only for ‘fucken’ shitcunts’.
As you might be able to tell, Australian English isn’t the most pleasant form of Britannia’s mother tongue.
The fact that I was the only person to show up to the information session when 16 to 18 people have apparently enrolled alongside me pretty much tells you how keen Aussie youth are when it comes to education in general.
Oh well, at least I got to have a decent chat with the lecturer. Rad dude. Level headed.
I wouldn’t dare make the comparison between my blog and one of the greatest sitcoms to ever air on FOX 8 (We Aussies tend to get everything way after the States.) but I can’t help but feeling like the similiarities are there while typing up a post.
I rarely have anything substantially interesting or deep and meaningful to post about and when I do, it’s usually centred around a topic of either a trivial or materliastic nature. Blogging was never my forte and blogging consistantly even less so. I would honestly be surprised if anything still reads this gobbledigook.
When I run into some more adventures or date another girl from across the pond, I’ll be sure to blog about it. OK?
Before I start this little post, I thought I would list all of the things that I have obtained since I graduated from tertiary college back in July 2016, just so that this post doesn’t come of as entirely negative. So without further adue, the stuff which I got after I finished uni includes:
Two flashy certificates with wax seal stamps (A degree and a diploma)
A beanie from one of my colleges.
A four-colour pen. (The tutor had a spare)
An appreciation for volunteer work.
An apperciation for working in the social work/community development sector in general.
A mechanical keyboard for my shitty six year old Mac.
A new phone that now, is kinda useless to me for anything other than making/receiving calls.
A mean looking ‘Middle Eastern beard’
Another friend group.
A taste for pale ales and lagers.
A taste for alcohol in general.
A black pair of super skinny jeans. (Yeowch!)
A fondness for the beach and the ocean.
Lady friends in Italy. (Thanks Instagram!)
Lady friends in Turkey. (Again, Thanks Insta!)
A license to sell/serve alcohol. (I could become a bartender maybe … ?)
I am sure there are way more but I honestly can’t think of them off the top of my head. Now then, why don’t we make it fair and list the things that I did NOT receive or obtain after my graduation?
Despite applying for work like mad, nothing seems to be going my way. A lot of people have told me that going back to Uni would be a waste of another two or three years and would put me at risk of being considered ‘overqualified’ for my field of choice. Of course, I would take any job at this point in time. Hence why I’ve found myself completing short course after short course to obtain some extra skills in the employability department. (License to Serve, First Aid, a course on how to make coffees/cappucinos at a bar/cafe/restaraunt, a certificate in training and assessment, etc)
People keep telling me that something must come along eventually. Let’s just hope that these people are right, and are also talking from experience.
Anyways, that’s my post for the month/year/decade. What have YOU been up to?
Much to my own glee, I am finally able to update this dusty litle slice of internet nonsense. Here I come, back but not in black. Why? Because you’d have to be made to wear any dark colours during an Australian summer but I digress.
Yes, so after much contemplation, procrasination and lamentation, all to do with my future course of action, I am back with another spontaenous and haphazard blog post about a topic that I didn’t think I would be writing about for quite some time: Love.
Although I have only been single for a couple of months now (Or at least I think it’s a couple, or a few at the very least. I am not entirely sure, I haven’t exactly been keeping count.) and have been enjoying the good company, drink and ‘benefits’ of the single life, my inner romantic has been crying out across the seas after some interaction with some lovely ladies from across the pond. You can’t believe how lucky I am to be able to collaborate with and chat to such lovely people but most of it makes me realise just what kind of fun I have been missing out on in my life.
And that is a quirky, artistic yet fiscally conversative EuroCutie with an awesome sense of fashion!
Unfortunately it’s only a dream at this point. Being stuck on a giant sunburnt island sort of makes travelling to said cuties a bit difficult for me. But hey, maybe the allure and the legends of the Great Southern Land will lead them here to me instead.
Not that it should be considered as such, since everyone, their mothers and their dogs seemed to know about this one particular feature. But you know that thing that you can do with your phone on SnapChat? The one where you’re taking an ordinairy selfie only to have your recently captured picture self spewing rainbows? Well, yeah. That’s a thing. I only found out about this a week ago at a party.
“But Dandy, ya numbskull!” You wail, gork and snort. “This feature has been present in SnapChat for AGES! How could you only find out about it now?”
And that’s a darn good question, Mr/Mrs/Ms. Disembodied Voice over the Internet! But the answer is the real kicker.
It’s one word. ‘iOS7’
… well, that’s not really a word. More like an acronym. But yeah, you get what I mean.
Hey, don’t beat yourself up about any past social networking blunders you might’ve made.
This one time, I was trying to notify my followers of a new video via direct messages and instead, I accidentally made a group conversation between all three hundred of my followers at the time. Pretty much everyone left shortly after the conversation was made. God, I felt like such a clumsy cucumber. I think I even lost followers because of it, too.
What about yourselves? Have you ever found yourself making an inexcusable error on the Twitters or the Facebooks?