Posted in Blog, life, Musings, People, personal, sleep

The Beatdown Blues & ‘Super Friends’

Yup. Time to flex the blogging muscles. This is the part in which I hold up my grossly curved fingers and crack them all at once before typing up a storm. Sorry to put that horrible mental image into your noggin but I couldn’t resist …

It’s not easy being a community services/sociology student. Last year we were learning about things like social justice, gender stereotyping, socio-economic growth and community development. It wasn’t even that big of a deal, to be honest. These are merely the daily trends and topics of conversation of one that trawls through enough social networks and/or blogging platforms. What really beats you into a pulp is the second year shit. Suddenly, we’ve gone from “Hey, you know, girls don’t have to play with toys that are pink. It’s all apart of marketing. The media is bad that way.” to “Right, so now we’re going to have a class discussion about suicide.”

Did you sense that rift? Quite an escalation, huh?

Quite stupidly, when talking about mental illnesses, a lot of the students (which probably includes myself) start to over analyse and before you know it, your classmate is rocking back and forth in the corner of the room in a fit of disbelief due to her apparent and rather sudden self diagnosis of borderline personality disorder while the Dandy, who is already one of the most anxious people in the class, has a panic attack out of fear of developing paranoid schizophrenia. It’s bat shit insane. The teachers refer to it as ‘med student syndrome’ which apparently comes from some kind of self diagnosis phenomenon that occurs during the second year through college.

You can only imagine how silly I must’ve felt explaining the reasoning behind my nasty bout of extreme anxiousness to my friends. There I am, freaking out like they’re going to either take it the wrong way and actually take it a step further into thinking that there is something genuinely messed up about the Dandy when I cop two rather blunt (yet comforting) replies:

“Yeah …  So? I do the same shit too, man.” 

“You know, they say that psychology students and others that study mental illnesses and disorders start self diagnosing and over analysing as they further into their studies … “

Good to know that there are people out there keeping it more real than I am.

But honestly, the attack took an absolute toll on my energy. Head pulsating migraines, strained eyesight, a seemingly fixed state of frazzledness within the mental realm … Just all of the icky feelings that come with being on edge, really. It’s also partially the reason why I haven’t been blogging as often as usual. It just seems that school has this effect on me. This ‘Grovel before your fear of the future and of failure!’ kind of effect.

I mean, I know I might be an awfully charming guy with an undeniably witty sense of humour but even I need someone to help me out of the rough, too …



"And so, let my heart be hardened." This blog was all but abandoned, gathering digital cobwebs and whatnot, before I checked back in after the pitter-pattering of cyberrain. Or were they emails? Let this place be a beacon for my mind during my few sleepless nights.

7 thoughts on “The Beatdown Blues & ‘Super Friends’

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